For today.

And 3, and 4, and 5, and 6 - Keep it up.

I would like to take this time to provide a relatively public service announcement for anyone who either is, or may believe themselves to be, extremely out of shape. If you should happen to purchase, against whatever sense you may have, or preconceived notions that you are too cool for this, any form of exercise dvd with the words "boot camp" in the title, know this: Those skinny bitches on the cover may not be able to form overly complicated rambling sentences with nearly the amount of boredom-inducing talent you have yourself, but if you should be so assumptive as to attempt following their instruction (albeit clumsily and out of rhythm), that they will indeed kick your ass. And you may not know it then, but you will the following day. So either don't buy one of these things if you think you can't deal, or shut up, and keep doing it until you can move in sync without the aid of intoxicants or the simple fuel of intense self-loathing. Thank you. 

Digging up the past. The recent past.

These are to usher in the nice 50-degree (and warmer) day we'll apparently be enjoying today. Usually, Wednesdays are my day off, but right now I'm waiting to hear if my phone rings, since I may have to fill a shift. It's pretty late, and I'm guessing I probably won't be called. Maybe I'll pick up a camera instead. 

Some pictures to brighten things. Or not. Or maybe. You decide.

The downfall of my existence...SO EMO

There are these times Keith and I decide it's a good idea to go to Martin's at one a.m. to purchase things to eat-- to eat also at one a.m., things like Entenmann's Brownie Bites and so forth... These items and their untimely consumption will be the downfall of my existence. Or, at least, the downfall of my ever-expansive waistline. For the record, no, we are not stoners, or anything of the sort. We are however,  enablers.  We have literally spent twenty minutes at a stretch reading labels of such goods, analyzing the pros and cons of various obviously bad foods, and arguing points that only hold sway amongst ourselves. Totally grandiose crap labored over totally mundane, horrible, nutritionally devoid (and therefore ultimately satisfying at this hour) junk food. I think that we may also have to start a co-dependently based self-help group of two to free ourselves...from ourselves. Susan Powter would really dig this. Stop the insanity!!!

Boy, this is tasty.

...

Success. 

Tomorrow's the day. Tomorrow, I go dress shopping.

I have an appointment, so it's all official and stuff. I figured an appointment was the best way to make sure I don't find some reason not to go. Honestly, I'm waiting to have them tell me something terrible, like that I'm too late, nothing can be ordered this close to the wedding. Or that yes, they can get me the dress I want, but it will be $500 more dollars because they have to rush it and I'm "plus-size" in bridal measurements. Everyone can tell me to be positive all they want,

 I'm used to hearing it. But I'm not starting any new trends, so you can stuff it. 

Luckily I have moral support in the form of Valerie. Hopefully she'll still want to come to the beach after shopping with me tomorrow. I decided just to go to one store, figuring that if I only have one place to look, there's less that can go wrong. Fewer things to be indecisive between. And only one old seamstress to have to convince myself it's okay to get half naked in front of. You know, because that's not going to be awkward or anything. Sure, she's seen who knows how many brides in ill-fitting bloated looking white satin. But how many unfamiliar old ladies have I had to strip down for? That would be none, if anyone reading this wonders. 

For your viewing pleasure, here are a few gowns I would like to think I might have a chance with, given my wallet can stretch far enough and my body can be Spanxed in enough.